Llammas falls around 1st August
and is the time of first harvest in the old Pagan wheel of the year. August
also marked the Festival of Lug, god of the sun. Whilst we can still lie in
warm fields and watch the tress and corn yellowing there is also the awareness
that the sun has passed its peak in mid June and is now starting to wane.
This is a time to make the most of the warmth still held in the air and the
soil, and to enjoy the more expansive energy we all feel once warmed and
relaxed by its summer rays. It is still time to explore and wander and go on
adventures. So I did.
At the start of the year I envisaged my
walks all happening within the UK. My modern life is different to those of my ancient ancestors in that my roaming grounds are larger and probably cross country borders more frequently. I am sure my ancient ancestors did travel long
distances sometimes too. However one of my grandmothers never left these shores
at all and I am sure that today there are fewer people around who have never
crossed the sea at least once. Although in January when I chose to do these
walks I assumed they would all be native it seems fitting that one of my
walks has happened out of the country; in the Catalan Pyrenees of northern Spain.
This walk was an unusual one as it involved
a hike into the wilderness of the mountains and its fair to say a hike into the
depths of my soul. Not entirely an easy place to navigate on both levels. I was
part of Ecodharma’s (www.ecodharma.com)
first ever Earth Initiation course. Essentially it was a Vision Quest involving four
days and four nights fasting in the wilderness with just a large container of
water to sustain me. In a tribal society the Vision Quest was used as a Rite of Passage to mark the transition from adolescence to adulthood. My group ranged from around 20 to around 50 so it was clear that the ceremony has needed to adapt to encompass the needs of modern people not attached to the rituals of a village community life. Fourteen brave souls who had never met each other gathered together at the stone
buildings upon the dusty ground surrounded by the grand vistas that make up
Ecodharma to begin the process. Under the spreading shade of an old oak tree with mountains for a
backdrop we set our intentions for the Quest, shared deep parts of ourselves and prepared as
best we could to put ourselves through this rite of passage with the help of
our guides. The temperatures were in the mid 30’s and the gradient of the land involved plenty of
steep scree slopes. Snakes and scorpions were hidden out there somewhere, rarely seen but active. The circling vultures high on the ridge reminded us of
the constant presence of death alongside life and the impermanence of own positions. Conversely the mountains loom in the background,
turning beautiful colours in the dawn and dusk light yet seemingly solid and impervious
to any other change. They hold fast as if they could wait patiently through an eternity whilst
generations of human beings come and go beneath their peaks. Yet the small landslides
and rock slips show that even these behemoths are not exempt from the fluid
forces of change that shape all of the earth and keep everything in a constant state of flux.
With our intentions set and our rucksacks packed each of us passed through the threshold and out into the wilderness. No food would be eaten, no conversations except with ourselves and the land would be had. We were on our own, until we returned on the 5th morning to break our fast and reconnect to the tribe. The contents of my
four days and four nights reside best within me, my tribe and the
landscape that held us. I don’t think it would translate very well in the
telling either way. I learned to take better care of myself, I dreamed and imagined, I walked and wandered, I re-awakened a part of my creativity which was hidden, I spoke to the universe, I braved
the intense heat, I created ceremonies that had meaning for me and I observed and
learnt from my greatest teacher nature itself. I survived and sometimes I thrived. The story sharing council which followed marked and mapped our journeys and bonded our experiences to the landscape and to each other.
I learnt much whilst I was out there. I
am still integrating it and probably will be for quite some time. I travelled a long way
within myself (and on the glorious seats of a 30 hour Megabus to Barcelona and
back). I was inspired and humbled by the soul adventurers I met within my
Vision Quest tribe. I was amazed at the dedication and commitment of our 3
facilitators to hold the whole thing together; it was one of the most intensive
programmes to facilitate I have ever taken part in mainly due to the ten days
of sustained support, guidance, teaching, listening and reflecting required on
their part. I am very glad they were willing to hold it and I am very glad I
chose to take part but the teachings were quite harsh for me at times. Yet I
think we get what we are ready for and if this rotivation of my soul provides
fertile ground for the growth of my life in years to come then it is always worth
it. If my teachings were heavy at times then I trust I can deal with them otherwise they
would not have been given. I was afforded the time and space to consider my own
personal harvest, a luxury not everyone is able to have. I could consider
the things that I had sown and the things I had reaped. I learnt what things
needed more tending and attention. I got inspiration for some new things I can sow.
And I learnt the importance of taking care of and enriching the soil from which
it all comes, the bedrock of my life holding it all together.
I give my deepest thanks to my 13 fellow
vision quest adventurers, you are all amazing and you are still inspiring me now, to our facilitators Rupert,
Rhonda and Subachitta, to Joe our chef for keeping us fed, and to all the back
of house support at Ecodharma to make it happen. I also want to thank myself for
being brave enough to undertake this journey and to always keep on keeping on.
